My journey with cancer

Purpose

My name is Michael Noakes, I'm 52 years old and have been battling cancer for 13 years. Howdy, the purpose of this site is to share ongoing communication regarding my life with cancer, where I’ve been, what is going on now, and the pending stem cell transplant to take place for the lymphoma leukemia I have. Life is a blessing and each day is a gift.

Where I’ve been

13 years ago I was diagnosed with fibro sarcoma in my left ankle. 2 surgeries and a year in rehab learning to walk again and I was good as new, just won’t be running in any marathons soon. No chemo or radiation therapy was required.

6 years ago when I was just about to be released by my Oncologist, a bump was found in my neck. A biopsy confirmed a diagnosis of SLL, small lymphocytic lymphoma, and CLL, chronic lymphocytic leukemia. A cancer for which there is no cure, but good potential remission periods. After 9 months of Retuxin (mono clonal antibody) therapy I went into remission. 2 years later it came back. 1 year of chemotherapy took place and I again went into remission. 22 months later it returned again.

Where I am now

After the second reoccurrence took place, it become evident that traditional therapies was only buying me time, each time the cancer coming back stronger. This is when I began researching other solutions and the realization that a stem cell transplant might be an option. After proper authorization, a consult was done at Stanford University in Palo Alto California. It was determined that my form of cancer, current diagnoses, and current overall health made me an ideal transplant patient. My siblings (4 brothers and sisters) did not find a match. However, through the National Bone Marrow Donor Program 4 exact matches were found. The best of the 4 turned out to be a 21 year old male, international donor. I was blessed to have found an excellent donor and on the first try. Legal reasons prevent me from finding out who exactly my donor is for at least a year, if at all. This fine young man will literally save my life, the ultimate gift.

Pre-transplant chemotherapy (called RCHOP) was 3 cycles, 3 weeks apart. By far the most brutal of chemo I have had. Shorter in duration that what I historically got, but more taxing on the body. Despite the side effects, I only missed 4 ½ days of work. I would either come in late or go home early, letting my body tell me when enough was enough. You really get to know your limits, and I tend to push them more, finally conceding when I either can’t get up, or can no longer sit. This disease has taught me to fight, stay positive, and never give up. I believe mental toughness is a key to fighting something that will do anything it can to stay and destroy. Caner can be relentless. It knows no boundaries, has respect for nothing. It does not discriminate by age, sex, nationality or way of life. Its sole purpose is to stay a live, and fight anything thrown at it. At times it wins, for others there is a stay of relief, hopefully allowing life’s natural causes to bring us to the next phase of our existence.

I become an inpatient at Stanford on 6-21-09, with a planned transplant date of 7-3-09. The cure is on the horizon.

Status/feelings

6-5-09 - Sixteen and days and counting before my admission to Stanford. Outpatient treatment begins in 11 days. The reality of this occurring is setting in. I am both excited while having a sense of nervous anticipation. While the mortality rate of the procedure is only 5%, one wonders if you may find yourself in that bucket. Cancer itself has a way of doing that to you. You know it may eventually win, but the thought of beating it is now very real. I need to keep telling myself that the road to recovery is long, as much as a year until you’re back at a consistent normal status. I need to focus on the prize, the ultimate outcome, and not be too caught in the daily and monthly continuation of fatigue and discomfort. It’s a 15 round bout; there will no reprieve when I’m feeling down and out in the 7th round. I need to stay focused on the prize. As I like to say “cowboy up”. Someday I want that put on my tombstone.